


Taken By Mitochondria

by copulationmatrix



Category: Original Work
Genre: Forbidden Love, Love at First Sight, Other, Romance, Science
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-02
Updated: 2020-04-02
Packaged: 2021-02-28 19:48:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,052
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23442721
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/copulationmatrix/pseuds/copulationmatrix
Summary: I had done it. I had succeeded where generations of scientists had tried and failed. I was finally going to be able to fuck a mitochondrion.Commissioned and written for JordanCon 2019. Posted with permission on A03 so that the world shall always know.
Relationships: Man/mitochondrion, Man/science
Kudos: 3





	Taken By Mitochondria

I was cutting nipple-holes in my white science coat when I heard a loud booming noise coming from behind the closed doors of my Sex Laboratory. I rushed into the lab and caught sight of my Sex Enlargement Machine, which is a machine that enlarges objects so that I can have sex with them. It was pulsing with crimson light, and I gasped in shocked pleasure as I saw the large object that hovered within its embrace.

I had done it. I had succeeded where generations of scientists had tried and failed. I was finally going to be able to fuck a mitochondrion.

The hyper-enlarged organelle floated alluringly in front of me, no longer visible only as part of one of those big diagrams of a cell in biology textbooks that you always have to memorize and make sure that you don’t mix up with the plant cell diagram two pages later. It was long and sleek, its phospholipid outer membrane dripping with raw organic desire, undulating gently like the skin of a moist, heated slug slowly crawling on its way to mate with another slug. This mighty powerhouse of the cell, which produces chemical energy in the form of ATP far more efficiently than simple anaerobic glycolysis, had become the powerhouse of my loins.

I reached out to touch the mitochondrion’s quivering outer membrane, my own chest heaving sexily so that the nipple-holes in the science-coat were slightly displaced. My science-attuned sex-eyes immediately caught sight of the porin beta-barrel proteins that studded the organelle’s sleek, glossy surface. I realized that whereas most of the time, porins are only big enough to allow energy-independent diffusion of small solute molecules through the mitochondrial membrane, right now they were big enough to allow the diffusion of my dick. My penis began to grow and swell like a plant cell placed in a hypotonic solution as my whole body was swept with sex-lust, which I sometimes call “slust.”

“I am going to stick my dick in that protein channel,” I cried seductively. I adjusted my protective science-glasses and ripped off my science-pants, and then thrust my love-boner into the beta-barrel.

It accepted my man-features as fervently as a ribosome clamping onto a strand of mRNA during the commencement of protein synthesis. Together, this lustful mRNA/ribosome pair would synthesize a new, never-before-seen fuck-protein, one that would bestow instant sexiness powers onto any lifeform that consumed it, and which would hopefully not misfold and cause a fatal prion disease.

My turgid science-stick swiftly entered the mitochondrion’s intermembrane space, the porin’s beta sheet gripping its tender stem in a firm, proteinaceous embrace. I moaned as I felt the organelle’s viscous inner liquids flow around my dick in a way that I had not experienced since last week, when I had used the Sex Enlargement Machine to fuck a Tide Pod. The entire laboratory shuddered along with my love-thrusts, the clinking sound of Bunsen burners like tinkling jewels adorning the nipple rings of the Goddess of Science herself.

I closed my eyes and thought back to the theory of endosymbiosis, in which an ancient bacterial ancestor of today's mitochondria combined with a much larger microbe roughly two billion years ago, beginning a symbiotic relationship that conferred an evolutionary advantage and eventually formed the basis of all multicellular life, just as this mitochondrion was currently forming the basis of my erection. In my mind’s eye, I saw the tiny proteobacterium thrusting its way into the soft, yielding cytosol of my welcoming unicellular ancestor. It penetrated still further into the ancient cell’s eager depths until it was fully encapsulated, gripped forever in an eternal embrace of gooey intracellular lust. This magnificent organelle had once entered my ancient ancestor, and I now entered it, creating an aeons-long sex-ouroboros that I hoped did not count as incest or anything like that.

I was wrenched back to the present environment of the Sex Laboratory as I realized what was happening: the engorged head of my meat-stick was now poised in front of the translocase of the inner membrane, the protein complex that facilitates the insertion of proteins into the mitochondrial matrix. Right now, it was about to facilitate the insertion of my dick.

I wailed with dick-rapture as my engorged flesh-pipette sank past the inner membrane and deep into the thick, protein-rich goo of the mitochondrial matrix. Recognizing the current sexual unity of our two lifeforms, the mitochondria in my own cells awoke as well in frantic bone-desire, providing increasingly efficient energy for my thrusts. The Sex Laboratory echoed with the noises of our lovemaking, which sounded a bit like an elephant repeatedly submerging its trunk in a large tub of glue. The mitochondrion in front of me began to throb and glow with its own rising fuck-energy, until the whole room was filled with a thick haze of ATP-powered lust-mist. The earthworms that I had bred to look more like penises shuddered lasciviously in their cages. New life spontaneously erupted in several petri dishes and immediately began to jerk itself. The ghost of Nikola Tesla finally lost its virginity. A mortar and pestle continued to somewhat resemble sex organs.

The crackling sex-power engulfed my own loins, and my orgasm burst from me like a NADH molecule losing electrons in an erotic process of oxidative phosphorylation. A new day in scientific sexification had dawned, raising itself proud and erect over the firm yet supple mountains of human knowledge.

As I released my own package of man-protein into the mitochondrion’s lust-channel, I contemplated the irony of the fact that the mitochondria in mammalian sperm cells usually do not survive the mating process even if fertilization does occur. I sighed and wiped away a small tear at the thought of those tiny, fallen mitochondrial comrades laying down their lives to sustain my man-juice. The sexy organelle in front of me shivered soothingly as if to comfort me, and my woeful dick-sorrow eased. I gently disengaged from my once-microscopic lover, and my erection suffered rapid apoptosis as the air cooled on my sweaty, cytosol-splattered crotch and my bare, science-coat-surrounded nipples. My slust was quenched.

Later that month, I won the Nobel Prize in Physiology or Medicine for my advancements in mitochondria fucking, and donated the cash award to several highly-rated and efficient anti-malaria charities.

**THE END**


End file.
